I think my favorite new stupid is the Microsoft ad with the semi-retarded redheaded chick looking for a laptop. Before I get started, I'd like to point out that I am a major proponent of ladies with red hair being prominently displayed on TV. As far as I'm concerned, the networks should cast nothing but hot redheads in every series they produce. Redheads are awesome. This is a fact. And since this is TV we're talking about, I know that the particular chick in this PC ad is an actress, and is not actually responsible for the bucket of bullshit dropping from her otherwise lovely mouth. So nothing I say from here on out should be misconstrued as an attack on this actress and her perty, perty hair. All references to her will be made toward her character, the aforementioned semi-retarded redheaded chick looking for a laptop.
So, the commercial starts with this idiot looking for a computer, specifically a laptop. Her requirements are that it be under $1000, "speed," a 17" display, and a comfortable keyboard. So right off the bat we know that this gal isn't going to MIT. The under $1000 part is fine. The "speed" request is about as vague as a statement could possibly be. There are a multitude of factors that go into the "speed" of a computer. And she wants a comfortable keyboard. I don't even know what to think about that. I would actually think more women would be pissed about this statement as it makes women look like the idiot consumers that advertisers want them to be. Wanting a comfortable keyboard is akin to picking a car because it has nice cupholders. It's pretty irrelevant to the operation of the product. Armed with these "needs," she ventures off into a world she's not ready for. And, perhaps, the world is not yet ready for the likes of her. But that's a topic for another day. Let's move on.
Strawberry Shortcake's first stop is to the Apple Store, where she is dismayed to learn that Apple laptops tend to cost a few scheckles (the only model under $1000 is the $999 MacBook, but it has a meer 13" display). So that immediatley kills her dream of ever owning a Mac laptop. Next she pops over to Best Buy or someplace like that, where magiclly she finds a HP model that gives her everthing she could ever want in a laptop. Of couse, when she gets home and tries to actually use the bleeding thing she will find out very quickly that the extra couple hundred bucks she saved by going PC was so not worth it. But that's not the point of the ad. The ad has nothing to do with the fact that she just bought a crappy laptop with an even crappier operting system. The point of the ad is that the pretty (but dumb as a stick) girl found the pretty (but equally as dumb) laptop of her dreams.
Why the hell aren't more women pissed off about commercials? I mean, I'm cheesed off just because I'm technically-minded. I'd be hella pissed if I were a girl and ads were being tossed out onto the air portraying women (hot though they may be) as being this gd vapid and uninformed.
The morals of the story? 1) Macs are way better than PCs. 2) Redheaded chicks are hot. Thank you for your time.
Friday, April 3, 2009
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