More On Ads

I think my favorite new stupid is the Microsoft ad with the semi-retarded redheaded chick looking for a laptop. Before I get started, I'd like to point out that I am a major proponent of ladies with red hair being prominently displayed on TV. As far as I'm concerned, the networks should cast nothing but hot redheads in every series they produce. Redheads are awesome. This is a fact. And since this is TV we're talking about, I know that the particular chick in this PC ad is an actress, and is not actually responsible for the bucket of bullshit dropping from her otherwise lovely mouth. So nothing I say from here on out should be misconstrued as an attack on this actress and her perty, perty hair. All references to her will be made toward her character, the aforementioned semi-retarded redheaded chick looking for a laptop.

So, the commercial starts with this idiot looking for a computer, specifically a laptop. Her requirements are that it be under $1000, "speed," a 17" display, and a comfortable keyboard. So right off the bat we know that this gal isn't going to MIT. The under $1000 part is fine. The "speed" request is about as vague as a statement could possibly be. There are a multitude of factors that go into the "speed" of a computer. And she wants a comfortable keyboard. I don't even know what to think about that. I would actually think more women would be pissed about this statement as it makes women look like the idiot consumers that advertisers want them to be. Wanting a comfortable keyboard is akin to picking a car because it has nice cupholders. It's pretty irrelevant to the operation of the product. Armed with these "needs," she ventures off into a world she's not ready for. And, perhaps, the world is not yet ready for the likes of her. But that's a topic for another day. Let's move on.

Strawberry Shortcake's first stop is to the Apple Store, where she is dismayed to learn that Apple laptops tend to cost a few scheckles (the only model under $1000 is the $999 MacBook, but it has a meer 13" display). So that immediatley kills her dream of ever owning a Mac laptop. Next she pops over to Best Buy or someplace like that, where magiclly she finds a HP model that gives her everthing she could ever want in a laptop. Of couse, when she gets home and tries to actually use the bleeding thing she will find out very quickly that the extra couple hundred bucks she saved by going PC was so not worth it. But that's not the point of the ad. The ad has nothing to do with the fact that she just bought a crappy laptop with an even crappier operting system. The point of the ad is that the pretty (but dumb as a stick) girl found the pretty (but equally as dumb) laptop of her dreams.

Why the hell aren't more women pissed off about commercials? I mean, I'm cheesed off just because I'm technically-minded. I'd be hella pissed if I were a girl and ads were being tossed out onto the air portraying women (hot though they may be) as being this gd vapid and uninformed.

The morals of the story? 1) Macs are way better than PCs. 2) Redheaded chicks are hot. Thank you for your time.

Main Street / Wall Street

For some reason I've been noticing commercials more often. It's possible that I've been watching too much live television so I can't TiVo through the ads like I normally do. Anyway, in watching these ads I've picked up on a few things, one of them being the proliferation of the the Wall Street vs Main Street tags. Since the economy has been in the shitter I've been hearing this a LOT. I'm at the point where I become angry when I hear it. Maybe the first one or two ad writers who though this quasi-catchphrase was clever (it's not, BYW, and it's actually quite old), but it seems like every gd writer who can't think of anything better to crap out onto the airwaves has decided to glam onto this horrifically fucked-out tag. STOP IT!!! BE ORIGINAL!!! I don't want to here about any damn streets, or fat cats (whatever the fuck those are supposed to be), or any other shit like that. It's bad enough I'm forced to endure your crappy, unentertaining ads, but at least pretend to try to make a decent ad.

That said, I will give props to Sony. Last night I saw an old Sony VCR ad from, like, 1982. The tag on the ad was about recycling old commercials as part of a whole green promotion. That was clever. Much love.

More Options, Dammit!

I've been working on my class schedule for the next two semesters (well, two summer sessions, then the fall). The thing that bugs me is that so many classes that I need to take are only offered once a year. I get that some of these classes are specialized, and that only but so many people are taking them each year, but only offering them once? That can really screw up a schedule, especially when I'm trying to graduate in two years. I have three classes left to schedule. I plan on taking them this spring. However, I have no idea what days these classes will be offered. With my luck, all three will only be available on, like, Tuesday or something. It's such a crap shoot. This was so much easier when I was working on my undergrad.

Bad Ad

What the fuck is the deal with the Boost Mobile ad with the two pigs eating ham? Two pigs, eating ham (apparently from a pig they once knew), talking about cell phones. Fuckin' weird.

Coming Soon...

I have a whole long bitch session on deck for next week. Topics will include digital cable, the new Windows commercial, and some other stuff that I wrote down at home. I'm a touch drunk right now, and I'm not in a typing mood. More to come...

Today's Entry Didnt' Quite Happen

Hey there, kiddies.

I funny thing happened on the way to the blog today. I started typing a long and detailed bitch session about trying to apply for unemployment. I was about three paragraphs in when, much to my surprise, I was able to get everything worked out. Once I did, I felt bad about bashing them and their (still somewhat) ass-poor system. But it's not as bad as I once thought. So there you go.

Still, I should complain about something. Uh...how about airline food. Do people still hate airline food? Me, too. It sucks. Though, come to thing of it, I've never eaten on a plane.

How about this? It's cold outside. That sucks. Peace out!

Cultural Differences

I got my daily e-mail from school today. It's just about the goings-on at and around campus. Here's one of the topics:

Intercollegiate YMCA to Hold 1st Annual Cornhole Tournament

I've lived here in Southern (that's right) Indiana for about seven years now, and I'll never get over the fact that they refer to a beanbag toss game as "cornhole." If you're like me, the term "cornhole" has a very, very different meaning. And it should have absolutely NOTHING to do with the YMCA.